I originally posted this anecdote over at jimhines's excellent post about the ridiculousness and uselessness of the "Don't Be a Victim!" sentiment. rikibeth encouraged me to repeat it here, as "a wonderful illustration of the practice."

So here goes.

Back in the day, before I had kids, I worked in a few dance clubs. Drunk, aggressive men were par for the course. One night, there was a drunk customer who kept trying to put his arm around me as he chatted me up, and a few minutes into this... uh, "conversation," a second man came over and turned the talk into something resembling coherency. After a couple of minutes, the first guy decided this wasn't going the way he wanted it to and wandered off. Once he was sure the first guy had retreated far enough he wasn't likely to be coming back, the second guy told me I'd looked uncomfortable and he'd wanted to come over to make sure the situation didn't get out of control. He didn't work at the club, he didn't know the drunk guy, he didn't know me, he just saw a young woman in what could have quickly become a bad situation and wanted to help out. He didn't expect my gratitude, either; once he'd explained what he'd been doing, he told me that if anyone else started bothering me to come look for him at his table and went back to what he'd been doing before. I have very mixed feelings about this experience. On the one hand, it's a good example of how sometimes a decent person does notice what's going on and will come over to help. On the other hand, it's a rare enough occurence that it's got to be ten years later, and that incident still sticks with me.

Anyway, thank you, mystery dude. I never even got your name, but I think you're awesome, and I hope deeds like yours become more commonplace.